TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN --by Slick

(image source: hooverlibrary.org)

So I read somewhere today that a popular Nollywood actress from the South-South was appointed as Special Assistant to the Governor of Akwa Ibom State on Tourism. I just laughed and quizzed myself on the basis for her appointment. Was it because she featured in movies, because she paid eye-service at political rallies, or because she was a regular face at the Calabar carnival?

Deep thoughts huh? I thought so too. Call me whatever you like, but I think Ime Bishop a.k.a Okon Lagos or some other person would have understood the purpose of that kind of office in a state that has more special assistants than secondary schools. If you ask a Nollywood faithful who gave Akwa Ibom exposure in the entertainment scene, he or she would whisper “Iyammi” in your ears. From the movie hits he made, Akwa Ibom was seen in a different light. You don’t know the feeling we get when we hear someone say “That una Calabar guy funny die!”

Secondly, this lady we are talking about is yet to find a balance when it comes to matrimony. Yet I heard that the former Governor ensured that all special servants, sorry Special Assistants under his administration were married. Thus enforcing and instilling in them a sense of responsibility. If person no sabi siddon for toilet, na nyash e go sabi clean? But the Iyammi crooner has shown positive potential in this aspect as he is married with a beautiful daughter to crown it.

Think about it, the only time we see this Aunty is when there’s a state function or Carnival at the end of the year where she would come to show us her new sneakers. Aunty, people like us do not care about that. If you must be an ambassador to a state as beautiful as Akwa Ibom, then availability is important. Stop treating yourself like the eclipse of the sun where we see you once in a very long time.  Uncle Okon is ever available when we need him. All na phone call o. No be to dey beg you for follow back for twitter.

Ime is an Amana Isong (son of the soil), who knows the terrain and crannies of Akwa Ibom. One who knows what needs to be done to win the hearts of people. No formings, raw as he can get. What better person to expose Akwa Ibom to the society at large! Everyone would want to identify with the place that this bundle of laughter and entertainment originates from.

At this point, you are probably wondering who I am referring to. Well, it’s that Aunty whose name translates as Time in English. Yeah! Now you got it.