SWEET CHOCOLATE 2 --by Rose

“How was your day? Did you make any sales?” Her mother asked hopefully. She shook her head. Time was running out and her sister needed the money badly. “Is that why you are looking so discouraged?” Her mother smiled. “Sweet choco, if I cried every time life hit me hard, do you think I would have been alive today? Just imagine how I survived after your father had left us.” Debora sighed, what her mother had said was true, she believed more than ever that help would soon come her way. “Mama where is Eno?” Her sister was the black sheep, always up to something mischievous. Because of her recklessness, she was carried along some criminals at a night club she frequented, that was what brought them to this level of desperation, they paid a huge amount of cash to bail her from the Police station. Sometimes she felt like giving up on her sister. Eno wasn’t considerate at all, she loved to mix with rich kids in the neigbourhood. One of the reasons she had refused attending a public school, she wanted the life of the rich and famous. Sadly, she was getting it but at a very high price. They had nicknamed her “Ewa,” she was compared to a female dog whose urges were insatiable. Eno had made it her duty to sleep with any rich kid in the neighborhood just to get some cash from him and to belong. This usually made their mother very sad.

“I don’t know where that girl has gone too, just change your clothes eat something and get some sleep. I don’t know how much longer we will cope with her behavior.” Just as they finished speaking, Eno stormed into their little room angrily. “Who’s behavior? So now both of you gossip about me, even you Mama?”  Deborah was stunned, this was the girl she had collected her own share of the esusu to bail out of cell and here she was insulting not just her but their mother. “Are you crazy?” Deborah asked, with this question she received a slap that sent her reaching for her balance. “Ask me again, you bloody pretender, you always act like you are better than I am, are you a virgin? Ehn!” Deborah lay on the floor for sometime not understanding what had hit her. She felt her mother’s hands gently comforting her and to Eno she had so much to say but chose to keep silent. “So Mama both of you cannot talk again? I will be back tomorrow for the money for my examination fees. Make sure it’s ready,” she packed a few clothes and left the room. “Mama, I will not hawk to pay that girl’s fees. Mama I have my own life to live, I need to start something for myself instead of working for an ungrateful bastard.” Her mother cautioned her. “Don’t call her that. No matter what, she’s still your sister, your flesh and blood, but I support your decision since Enobong has the guts to insult me and hit you, I believe she should have the guts to raise her own fees. Just get up, eat something. I prepared yam and ntong sauce, you will enjoy it.”

****

Aniebiet had dropped Morgana at her house. He explained why he couldn’t take her to his’. She understood him and kissed him goodbye wearing a frown. She had returned to this house with foolish workers. She hated each and every one of them; they were so lowly and poor, she hated such people. They practically irritated her hence, she had no patience with them. Immediately, the two maids and the cook ran out to help with her luggage but she shouted them back. “Don’t you have manners? I never asked for your help. You think I could allow your dirty and smelly hands on my bags, gosh y’all reek!” She spurned off. This left the servants feeling very sad. They wondered why Morgana was so mean to them, when her late mother had been so nice. They shook their heads and left, after all people were different.

Morgana Esio was an accomplished legal practitioner and a paragon of beauty, she was well sought after in their high class circle. Many times, sons of Ministers had approached her but she declined because she was in a relationship with Aniebiet Briggas. It was not just the fact that she was from a high class background but she was extremely beautiful. She was 5ft plus, light skinned, straight legs any woman could die to have, a perfect bust size, medium sized hips, it was her face that was her crown, her straight nose stood proudly on her smooth skin, her almond eyes had a shade of green in them which was very natural, her lips were soft and full but brown, but it made her more attractive. She knew she was hot and knew what she deserved. This made her deal with only people in her circles. They understood her better and shared similar passions than ordinary people.

But many times, she wondered if she was making a mistake, she had dated a man for four years and for once he never spoke of marriage. This bothered her because she couldn’t imagine herself being married to someone else. She was deeply in love with Aniebiet and wondered what she would do if he jilted her like the rest. She climbed the stairs leading to her room. “Home sweet home,” she mused and fell into bed. She suddenly remembered her appointment with Inemesit the following day. She smiled mischievously. She would teach her a lesson. She felt her phone ring, it was her father; he was out on a business trip. She sighed. She had the house all to herself; she had to invite him again.

WHAT EVERY KID TUTOR SHOULD KNOW --by Nickz

“Don’t open it on the road! Wait till you get home before you eat. Teacher says we should not always eat on the road.” Though the young girl really wanted to eat her biscuit, the words of her mate reminded her of what she already knew and reluctantly, she placed the biscuit back in her school bag. They were class mates, about five years in ages, trekking home after school. One had wanted to eat her cookies but because she was reminded of the ethics they were taught by their teacher, she restrained herself, to her displeasure. At such tender age, they were able to constrain their desires, thanks to their class teacher. I fell in admiration for these two and the inspiration to put this down emanated. It goes mainly to nursery school teachers, and then to other individuals who have the privilege of coaching kids.

I’ve observed that most kids between the ages of two and five show great ability of retaining what they’ve seen or heard. My little nephew of four will easily remember how I unlocked my phone and selected Temple Run for him. He would remember a dumb story I formulate to excite him into doing his home work, many weeks after I had forgotten I had said such outrageous fiction. And then when you’re guiding them through home works, you keep getting corrections from them because your approach is different from the “my teacher says…” version.

Back to the main gist; nursery teachers. How well do you impart on kids? Let me share a little story a parent once shared. This parent is a pastor and one day, he hears his four year old daughter reciting the lyrics of a provoking Nigerian dance hall song innocently. He was awestruck and quickly queried the young girl how she learnt such a strange and ungodly song. She said it was through her class teacher’s phone. The father took up the matter to school management level and it was discovered that the girl’s teacher usually played a collection of Nigerian dance hall music in class during break and some students unconsciously picked the lines. It was something she did on daily basis. As far as a parent was concerned, it was offensive.

A nursery school teacher should realize how sensitive her role is. She’s not just a teacher but an object of emulation to the young and magnetic minds watching her. What she says, does, listens to or displays goes many miles into the brains of these kids. Sometimes, these teachers lack the patience and basic psychology to tolerate and groom the kids adequately. Like litmus paper, these children easily absorb the words, gestures, discipline and instructions, reflecting them later at homes or amongst their peers. Being a good nursery teacher requires more than academic qualification and teaching skills. It’s a sensitive form of ministration that requires skilled method of impartation. It requires motherly love, affection, patience and understanding; it’s a form of child adoption.

In conclusion, the role of nursery school teachers is delicate. It is recommended that these employed teachers pass through adequate screening and training so they can be qualified to impart wisdom and sound doctrines to these innocent and absorbent minds.

THE MASQUE --by Rose

The natural thing that comes with being human is our desire to be accepted by others, to be well spoken off and to be praised. In order to achieve this, we try as much as possible to paint a good image of ourselves to others. The masque is often worn to conceal our true selves, to prevent others from perceiving out reality or our true nature. This is very evident when people are in a relationship heading towards marriage. Once the man declares his intention, both parties suddenly become ‘perfect’, but soon explode after marriage. What we fail to point out is that human beings are not ‘perfect’. The masque I’m writing on today is Domestic Violence by men.

Ladies, how do you spot a man that may be violent later? And what is the possible way out?

First of all, he is usually very nice, in fact overly nice, he is flawless, you can’t pin dirt on him, he is generous; buys you gifts, takes you on dates, treats you like a lady should be treated in all respects, but watch out.

If you’re the type that has a large social ring of friends, he would feel very uncomfortable, you see, he wants you to himself, you are the object of his obsession. Slowly, he begins to point out the flaws in your friends and slowly you begin to ‘see’ it too, he has succeeded in pushing all your friends away, you are now left and dependent on him alone, this is exactly what he wants.

When you stand with a member of the opposite sex or receive compliments from them, watch him closely. Some women like it when their man is jealous, that’s okay but this kind of man takes it too far, he imagines you being romantically involved with these men but he pushes it aside till marriage.

Violent outbursts by any man should make a woman think twice, but when a woman is ‘in love’, she loves to give excuses, maybe it’s work or stress, just a little something or sometimes he slaps you, and you ignore it; this is just the beginning.

He keeps playing perfect till the marriage ceremony is over, and he has you to himself, remember you no longer have any friends, so his next step is to push you away from your family. If he succeeds then you are welcome to hell. He becomes overly possessive and jealous and beats you to submission to make him feel in total control, this usually works when you cannot fight back or have nobody to talk to.

You are now trapped, and broken, subject to physical and emotional abuse, but you have no friends? No family, sometimes no money, so you are stuck with him, the once perfect guy who wore a masque so colorful that it covered his beastly nature.

Sadly, many women had seen all these signs before the marriage but they kept giving excuses, pretending not to see behind the masque, probably because of perceived wealth or fear of criticism, till they lost something vital: their self esteem.

Don’t be fooled by the charming masque of a beast.

(Note: this doesn’t mean good men don’t exist or aren’t charming too. This is where wisdom of Godly counseling and spiritual guidance comes to play.)

SWEET CHOCOLATE 1 --by Rose

“Oga buy this one o, this unripe plantain sweet pass the ripe one,” Deborah screamed as she ran after the moving car, the man ignored her and she retreated to the camp of hawkers near the Abak road traffic light. She sighed. Today had been the worst day since she started hawking; life hadn’t been very easy since their father had abandoned them for his new wife in the village. He had wanted an heir, a male child who would carry forward his name. Her mother had only given birth to her and Enobong, her only sister before she was diagnosed of an infection which had her womb removed through surgery. Her father could not bear the thought of being married to a ‘barren’ woman as he called her. With the help of his family, he got married to another and abandoned them in Uyo. “Wetin dey ur mind?” Sara, the garden egg hawker asked. She was her best friend around there, others did not flow well with her while the other young girls envied her because she was very beautiful and had lots of customers. “Nothing, just that today has been a very bad day and my sister needs money to register for her upcoming NECO examination.” “So na why u dey worry like this? You no get work. Instead of to worry, you no pray make dis god send us customer.” Deborah simply sighed and continued swimming in her thoughts.

She often wondered when her life as a hawker would come to an end. She was not getting younger, but she had to do this to increase the income for feeding. She prayed desperately in her heart for favour from God. She needed to breathe, to sleep without waking up early to run to the market to buy ingredients for her mother to prepare moi-moi for the student cafeteria in the University of Uyo. That business had helped them a lot, her mother had rented a little shade in the student market and they usually patronized her. Her mother was a hardworking woman, she kept telling her children that one day, somehow, they will study in the University of Uyo. Deborah smiled and wished that day could come quickly, she had finished her secondary education three years now but due to the obvious conditions, she couldn’t go further but she believed strongly that her dreams would not die. She remembered how she sneaked into lecture halls to have a feel student life, but the students always knew her as the hawker and looked down on her shabby dresses. That was why she stopped attending the lectures. What also made her quite conspicuous was her beauty. Many times, she had heard the students especially females whisper, “She’s too fine to be a hawker, god forbid!” Yes she was too beautiful, but how could one change their parentage? Many boys on campus had approached her but she turned them down because she didn’t believe in premarital relations and her mother had raised them with a firm hand. “Be proud, hold your head high even as a poor girl,” she remembered her mother instructing them. 

One of such male student advancements had gone sour. That was how she met Captain, her best friend on campus. She had served a group of rough looking boys and one made advances towards her, when she declined he broke the glass plate and began ranting, “Who you be sef, na only u dey this school? See this dirty ass girl o!” He had started making calculated efforts at her but before he could lay his hands, a bottle broke on his head and he fell down bleeding. By then, the attention of the security unit was drawn to the scene. “What have you done to him?” She had cried to her savior. “Girl you should thank me, this guy is a troublesome dude and he’s known around here, so basically I saved you.” She sighed, “Thank you.” When the security arrived and recognized the person who had been hit, they hissed and turned back.  “If I ever see you here again, I will break your head into tiny bits and send them to the Lord,” her savior said, pushing the guy outside roughly. He wiped his hands and returned. “My name is Felix Eggon, I’m known as Captain though.” “Deborah,” she replied hesitatingly, he smiled. “Don’t you have a nick? Like Debbie, Debo baby or Yellow sisi,” he teased. This made her laugh, she shook her head. He was silent for a while and suddenly lifted his face. “Sweet chocolate.” “What’s that?” She asked. He simply replied, “Nickname.”  That’s what everybody, including her own mother came to call her.

****

“Pick me at the airport, we’re almost on ground baby, luv ya baby,” she said sweetly. Morgana Esio was the luckiest woman in the state, at least, that is what she thought. She was an accomplished legal practitioner cum fashion designer, the only daughter of Chief Charles Esio Peters, coming from a high class family. She had met the most wanted bachelor in the state, Aniebiet Briggas, an engineer by profession, the manager of three branches of Briggas Construction Companies in Africa popularly known as BCC. Aniebiet was all a woman could dream of, all her desire; he was not just physically appealing but he was very rich and hardworking, and that was exactly the kind of man she needed to maintain her high born status. She had dated him for about four years now and her love for him grew stronger by the day, but it bothered her, as they landed on the ground, she wondered if he felt the same way. It’s not as if he didn’t care, but she knew for a fact that she was his most long standing girlfriend. Aniebiet had dated strings of women dumping each when he was tired, this made her to have more hope. Maybe he loved her that’s why he held onto her for so long and because she loved him, she had overlooked his flirtatious behavior. She walked briskly from the plane and walked towards the waiting area where she spotted her worst enemy, Inemesit, her one-time best friend who had an affair with Aniebiet. “Who am I seeing here?” She sneered. Morgana ignored her and moved on. “Seriously, you are getting too old for this, why do you act like you’re better than me? Remember you also cheated on him with my boyfriend so revenge is beautiful.” She stopped and walked towards her. “I slept with your boyfriend? But you told me you didn’t love him and you knew very well what Aniebiet meant to me and you stabbed me. Back off.” Inemesit did not flinch, she simply stared back at her. “What do you want from me?” Morgana asked. “I need your help. There’s a big fashion show I’m organizing and you have the props I just may use.” Morgana was about to say no, but this girl needed to be taught a lesson, and she would do her dirty, she smiled and walked off. “Okay, meet me at the Drokie’s, we’ll discuss there.”

She spotted Aniebiet’s car and increased her footsteps, he came out and hugged her, “Welcome darling, how was your trip?” she hugged him and whispered, “I’m tired.” After packing her luggage, he pecked her forehead, she smiled and they drove off.

BABY J --by Slick

Hey Guys! Thank you for stopping by to read something new, I hope you enjoy it. For the purpose of tribal fairness, I have decided to name the characters in this article with selected letters of the alphabet. Keep your eyes glued!

Mr and Mrs Z got married in the year 1990 and had stayed together for six years without the cry of a child in their home. Neighbours and relatives had begun to raise eye-brows as regards their predicament. Mrs Z was always a victim of side-talks and verbal abuse on a daily basis. Her husband had always been a source of moral and emotional support for her. However, this did not mean that he did not have sleepless nights day-dreaming about holding a baby in his arms. “Even if na only one! God abeg!” were the words he would unconsciously murmur to his Creator. As if the heavens were listening, in 1996, baby J was born. Baby J shared a very evident resemblance with its mother as a little child. Baby J was adored and loved by everyone it came in contact with. Its birth gave the hopeless some faith in God that they thought had forsaken them.

Baby J was dedicated in a small church in the neighbourhood, with the preacher proclaiming blessings and good wishes into the destiny of Baby J. Baby J was going to be someone great in life, or so everyone thought. But Baby J turned out to be the exact opposite of what Mr and Mrs Z had dreamed Baby J would be. Baby J brought tears to the eyes of his parents as well as those of people in the immediate society.

Come on! After everything Baby J was given as a child? His parents struggled to ensure that Baby J at least had a good childhood. Now Baby J was a terrorist, prostitute, armed robber, cultist, petty thief etc. What happened to my child? was the question Mrs Z constantly asked herself.

Across Nigeria and the world beyond, families like that of Mr and Mrs Z exist. Whatever happened to their Baby J’s? Their Baby J suddenly became a renowned menace to the society. Yes! I am talking about that one that has got thick black lines drawn over his or her eyes in National Dailies or the Internet with the intent of hiding their identity from the public. I am referring to that one that was responsible for several insurgent attacks on innocent lives that went to pray in Church or the Mosque. We are all familiar with one Baby J that stands at bus-stops at night hawking her body!

Sometimes, they are products of poor up-bringing people, influenced negatively by their immediate environment. Or sometimes people that feel they did not really have the power of making sound choices in this life or people on a revenge mission. Their exploits are usually felt by their families and families of others at large. One cannot begin to quantify the horror that lives lost in gun battles and blasts have created in families, or the agony experienced by parents whose children have been taken away by the cold hands of death solely because of the deeds of a Baby J somewhere. The list is simply inexhaustible.

Therefore, it is paramount for every parent or would be parent to create measures to protect the choices Baby J would make in this life. Baby J might be a miracle or a time-bomb waiting to explode somewhere. In the minds of Mr and Mrs Z, they are sometimes forced to wish that they did not have a child at all instead of having this source of worry as a child.

Bible scholars would argue that the scriptures say “Train up a child in the way that he should go, and when he’s grown; he would not depart from it”. Are we going to jump to the conclusion that these Baby Js exist because they were not trained in the way that they should go? Question for another day sha! I hope when we wake up every day, we can say a word of prayer for a Baby J somewhere in the world. They need it, they need healing, revival and restoration.  This would be a step in the right direction of curbing the effects that their actions have on their families and members of the society at large.

Thank for reading!

THE PHOTOGRAPHER 11 --by Rose

(Image source: gettyimages.com)

Nadie and Udeme had just finished shopping for shoes when they spotted one woman they both abhorred. Adenike had also seen the pair and was quite fascinated; two friends dating the same man, she thought. There was something fishy going on. She deliberately walked towards them. Udeme flinched like she saw a ghost and that made Adenike chuckle. “Hello pretty lady and not-so-pretty-lady Edwards,” she said with a smirk. “What do you want?” Nadie asked, praying and hoping the evil witch won’t run her mouth about her and Bode in front of Udeme, she mustn’t know! “Well, relax, I won’t spill the beans if you play by my rules,” she reverted her eyes to Udeme, who wondered how the two had met. “And you Barrister, how is that leg of yours? Is Bode done playing with it?” I’m sorry madam, I don’t understand you. We have to go now. We’re in a hurry obviously,” she rolled her eyes and walked away, leaving Nadie at her mercy, the claws of that witch, she muttered.

As she reached the car, she turned realising Nadie hadn’t followed her and she wondered why the two were still talking, how did Nadie get to know Adenike? And what secret was the woman talking about? Something was definitely wrong somewhere, her friend wasn’t being straight with her. “I’m here love,” she said sweetly as she entered the car. “What was that about?” Udeme asked, looking startled, not waiting for a reply she continued. “That woman was very mean to me at the interview. How did you get entangled in her web?” Nadie was lost for words, like what the hell, was she gonna say now? “Uhhm,” she began, clearing her throat, “It’s a long story, would tell you later.” Really? Ud thought. So much for friendship. She ignited the engine and drove off.

“Udeme, it’s not as if I’m keeping secrets but when it’s appropriate, I would definitely tell you,” Nadie pleaded, she had to tread carefully. If Udeme found out she had something to do with Bode, everything was gonna be messed up, Udeme had nothing to say, she just stared on quietly. Gone were the days she was so attached to her friend and got hurt a lot. Now she had Bode and she had no time for this. “Drop me by the ice cream eatery, I won’t be following you back home,” Udeme said and Nadie became perplexed. She hadn’t expected her friend to react the way she was. “Come on Ud, why the attitude, what’s all this for?” She pulled over for a conversation but Udeme had already stepped out of the car before she said a word. “Damn,” Nadie muttered. What was the ugly duckling feeling like right now? New found love, she sneered at this thought. She quickly remembered her appointment with Bode and seized this opportunity; she had to win him back, her baby. She smiled and drove off.

****

“I’m over here,” Bode waved to her as she stepped into the restaurant. He looked as handsome as ever, so enticing the way the blue shirt clung to his muscular frame, he was so simple yet elegant. She smiled and walked over but he looked different. He wasn’t friendly, he didn’t return her smile and kept going through his phone, and she instantly felt stupid. “Do you mind telling me what’s between you and Udeme?” She started, he just stared at her as she continued. “I thought I made it clear my friend has a fiancé, and soon they will get married, whatever is going on between you two has to end, it’s wrong.” “You’re such a bitch Nadie, I’m quite disappointed.” Maybe she heard it wrong, maybe. Did he just call her a bitch? “Excuse me?” “Yeah, you heard me. You ruined every chance I had with Udeme. How could you? I thought she was your friend?” “I don’t understand you,” she feigned ignorance. “You are engaged to be married to Duncan, you lied to me. You’re such a cheap whore, bedding another man while engaged? And you lied about Udeme getting married, who does that?” She stammered as tears shone in her eyes. No! He couldn’t do that to her, it was the fault of that bitch, that ugly duckling that claimed to be her friend, she must have told him she was getting married to Duncan. “Bode...please, I’m so sorry, I...,” he just waved her aside. “Now you’re gonna keep whatever happened between us a secret, I don’t want Udeme finding out, it cannot hurt her. She’s so precious to me, and I don’t ever want to ruin that. Keep away from me or else Duncan will get to know about our affair,” he looked her over and walked away without looking back. She felt like screaming; the pain was too much to bear. How could he do this to her? Suddenly, he had forgotten all what they shared, how he kissed her, made love to her. She felt numb. Udeme had stolen his heart and she was going to pay, she couldn’t imagine a life without Bode, she had to fight. Her tears spilled rapidly across her cheeks as his words echoed once again in her head, “she’s so precious to me.”

****

He carried her into the house, after their date at the famous lodge, she felt like the only girl in the world. He had hired a band and they played love songs all through the date. If she had known him better, she would’ve sworn he was going to propose. He dropped her on a cushion and smiled warmly into her beautiful and seductive eyes whose depths glowed like stars in the night. He fought the urge to kiss her, he had to take this slowly. He planned on getting married to this woman someday, and he had to be a gentleman in all respect. “Thank you so much dear, I had such a swell time,” she smiled back. He kissed her hair and inhaled deeply. “Lest I forget, I have something for you,” he dipped his hand in his pockets and brought out a golden vial. “Have it. It’s for you, my world.” She liked that name, my world. She carefully placed the vial in her hands and was surprised. No man had ever gotten her something this beautiful as well as expensive. She hugged him. “Baby this is so beautiful, thank you.” He felt happy she liked it. He would do anything for her smile. He had bought her two pairs of green diamond earrings, he knew what women loved and he wanted to please her at all costs. “It’s nothing. I just want you to know that I love you so much with my life, Udeme. Since the first time I set my eyes on you, I knew you were right for me, my world, my everything,” he laid her down on the carpet grass and placed his lips over hers, she responded and they were enveloped in this precious moment before they heard gunshots. She felt Bode stiffen, she jerked and held him up but it was too late, he was bleeding.

The commotion outside confused her. She heard shouts and gunshots. She pulled him behind the fountain. He was bleeding as he groaned in pain. “Bode hang on, it’s like we are under attack, please baby, stay with me,” she sobbed. Why was everything turning out this way? Luckily, they made it to the back of the fountain. Bode was still bleeding. She heard footsteps approach the garden as one man barked, “Where dem dey?” She could see him giving the old Chef a slap as she hesitated to answer him. “Dem bin come this side, plz no kill me, tender justice with mercy biko nna,” the woman begged but was given another blow on the head. “Dinka, search all this area, make sure you find them. If you spot that yarinya, waste am.”Udeme felt her heartbeat increase. From the conversation, she found out she was the target. Who could want her dead? The footsteps were getting nearer to where they hid. Bode had gone quiet, she felt his temperature and said a quick prayer. The situation wasn’t funny at all. Suddenly she heard three loud shots and fear almost ripped her apart. Two men had spotted her. She got up and began running but they caught her and whispered, “Madam, na we be the guards, wey Oga dey?”

MUMMY WELCOME! --by Nickz

(Image source: africanstockshots.com)

It’s few minutes after six in the evening and I’m taking an evening walk along the traffic-jammed road of Okporo in Port Harcourt, observing the environment and searching for something captivating. I walk, hands in pocket, fingering my phone but then, I remember I’m in PH so I put my hands out before some bad boys think I’m a threat. The road is quite busy with activities; road side traders, pedestrians, cars blaring horns, flying helicopters, power bikers—all sum up to escalate the restlessness of the oil and gas city. I stopped by to watch some young males play football in a school field but I get quickly bored because I’m a ‘super’ football fan. I tell myself, well, maybe today’s gonna end like this, without anything to put on paper so I turn around and start to walk back home. I branch the last street leading home and then, I stop by a kiosk to get items for dinner. While waiting for the lady to package the items, I see a young girl running out to embrace her mother who’s just returning from work. Though it reminds me of what I did during childhood, I overlook it but as I go, the scene comes up again and I laugh to myself, not because anything about it was funny but because I paint another picture on the canvas.

This is the stupid picture:

Bosco was returning from a football viewing center where he just enjoyed a match that gave victory to the team he fanned. His friend, Pepper was not too happy. He lost some money in betting so he was not really vibrant in the dialogue as his friend was. On a very normal day, Pepper was a very energetic and vivacious fellow. He could talk for minutes without quenching but the loss really cut him deep. "So because of 1K wey you lose for game, na him you de carry face like fowl nyash. Baba, calm down, today no be your turn,” Bosco mockingly advised. "You no understand man, na only one game cut, I for don collect 15grand come shine dis night. See wetin dis stupid club do me.” Pepper complained. He usually missed the bet narrowly, maybe the thing was not for him but he kept hope alive. “No worry, Champions League never finish, you still get chance to chop money,” Bosco said. As they walked down the local street, Bosco saw a lady few meters ahead of them, walking graciously. From the back view, she looked so perfect; the height, the hips, the long braids, the legs beneath her short gown, all was just too seductive for somebody like Bosco to ignore. Her chubbiness was an advantage as it enhanced the back side and made the hips more pronounced. Bosco tapped Pepper. “Guy, see!” He tried to point discretely at the girl. “You blind, you no de see that tornado wey de go so?” Pepper finally noticed the hot beauty. She was holding a polythene bag, probably returning from petty shopping. “I don see am o. Nna mehn! Ukwu odi nsobu! Choi! See food!” Pepper expressed his awe over the beauty. There was no way he was going to let the girl go without making a move. It was like Bosco read his mind. “Guy no even think that tin wey dey your mind. Na me first see am. Na me get am.” Pepper was also very interested too. “You sef no de pity person. You don see say I de grief unto the money wey I lose. You no fit carry dis one do mek I get small joy? You be my guy now, abeg free this one give me.” Bosco gave up without anymore argument. “Oya go try your luck na, I go dey mama aboy shop de wait you. No fall my hands o.” Pepper brightened up and patted Bosco on the shoulder. “Trust me now. No shele.”

Pepper hastened up and caught up with the lady. It was early evening hours and so, he could get a good look at her face. “Hello angel, abeg excuse me.” The young lady turned to his direction. Pepper was not a novice in the game so he didn’t have any concern over nervousness. She was good looking. Pepper did not use the cut-the-corner approach but went straight to the point. “Babe, as I watched you from behind, my mind no fit rest so I say mek I come hola you. Girl you fine die!” at first, the lady pretended she heard nothing and kept walking. But Pepper didn’t give up easily so he pressed on and after walking her some distance and feeding her with more complements, the lady smiled shyly and said, “Thank you.” Pepper was glad. It was working. He kept on following the lady. “So wetin be your name? My own name na Pepper.” The lady looked at him in amusement in a way that said what a name! “Alicia,” the lady gave him her name. “Chai! See sexy name! mek god bless your papa and mama as dem take give you dat sweet name!”

Alicia found him funny and was loosening up to him. Then when Pepper saw the time was ripe, he asked her for the phone number. She hesitated but Pepper said he would send her recharge card that same evening then she gave out the number. He started to boast to impress Alicia. “You see as you dey so, if me and you start parols, hmm, this your fine body go turn gold. The way I go take money paint you, no body go sabi you again. Your name go change to Alimony.” She looked at him and laughed. “Okay, you sound like a nice guy. I’d like to buy some extra items in this shop. Can you help me? I’m short of cash.” Pepper knew this kind of test. He wouldn’t back out now. “No wahala, mek we enter the shop. You dey with Pepper.” Even as he said that, he was scared. He lost money today and barely had something in his pocket. Somehow, he got lucky because she picked just few items that totaled a thousand and some fractions. He pulled out his last two thousand and paid at the counter. He told Alicia to keep the change, pretending he was okay with that. She was very happy and he was sure he had reached a guarantee level, like in Who Wants To Be A Millionaire show.

They left and she continued her walk home while Pepper followed. He really wanted to know where she stayed in case he had to visit. Finally, she took the last bend and they branched a narrow street. “No worry, mek the mechanic just finish my car, you no go de waka like this again. Na to just wire me call, I go show any place you dey come carry you home.” He lied. She patted him on the back sweetly. “You’re very nice dear. Thanks a lot for a wonderful evening. I want to say that….” Before she landed, three small creatures running like bullets dashed forward and slammed into Alicia in an embrace. “Mummy! Mummy! Mummy! Mummy! Welcome! Mummy did you buy chin chin for us? Daddy said when you come back you wash his socks. He has gone to buy fuel for generator. Mummy welcome!”

NPFL FIXTURES

16-MARCH-2016(Wednesday)

FC Ifeanyi Ubah

16

:

00

Nasarawa United

Enyimba

16

:

00

Shooting Stars

Akwa United

16

:

00

Ikorodu United

NPFL RESULTS: MATCH DAY 2- 6

		NPFL MATCH DAY 2: RESULTS
MFM FC			2	-	1	Rivers United FC
Lobi Stars			2	-	1	Sunshine Stars FC
Abia Warriors FC			2	-	1	El-Kanemi Warriors
Wikki Tourists FC			0	-	0	Heartland FC
Warri Wolves FC			1	-	0	Kano Pillars FC
Enugu Rangers FC			3	-	1	Plateau United
Niger Tornadoes			1	-	1	Giwa FC
		NPFL MATCH DAY 3: RESULTS
Shooting Stars			3	-	0	MFM FC
Rivers United			2	-	0	FC Ifeanyi Ubah
Ikorodu United			1	-	0	Lobi Stars
Heartland			0	-	1	Abia Warriors
Kano Pillars			2	-	1	Wikki Tourists
Plateau United			2	-	1	Warri Wolves
Enugu Rangers			2	-	1	Niger Tornadoes
		NPFL MATCH DAY 4: RESULTS
Giwa FC			2	-	1	Rivers United
FC Ifeanyi Ubah			3	-	1	Shooting Stars
MFM FC			2	-	1	Sunshine Stars
Akwa United			2	-	1	Heartland
Lobi Stars			3	-	0	El-Kanemi Warriors
Abia Warriors			0	-	0	Kano Pillars
Wikki Tourists			3	-	0	Plateau United
Warri Wolves			0	-	0	Enugu Rangers
Niger Tornadoes			2	-	0	Nasarawa United
Enyimba			1	-	0	Ikorodu United
		NPFL MATCH DAY 5: RESULTS
Enugu Rangers			1	-	0	Rivers United
Rivers United			1	-	0	Nasarawa United
Shooting Stars			2	-	1	Giwa FC
Sunshine Stars			1	-	1	FC Ifeanyi Ubah
Ikorodu United			0	-	0	MFM FC
El-Kanemi Warriors			2	-	0	Enyimba
Heartland			1	-	0	Lobi Stars
Kano Pillars			3	-	2	Akwa United
Plateau United			1	-	1	Abia Warriors
Warri Wolves			1	-	0	Niger Tornadoes
		NPFL MATCH DAY 6: RESULTS
Akwa United			2	-	0	Plateau United
Giwa FC			1	-	0	Sunshine Stars
FC Ifeanyi Ubah			4	-	1	Ikorodu United
MFM FC			3	-	1	El-Kanemi Warriors
Lobi Stars			2	-	2	Kano Pillars
Abia Warriors			2	-	2	Enugu Rangers
Niger Tornadoes			3	-	2	Rivers United