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Wednesday, 13 January 2016

AGE --by Kreed

It was a Tuesday afternoon. I sprawled across the office chair, as beads of sweat trickled from my forehead. The AC had been faulty for almost a week. It had once been our prayer for it to get faulty but now, we were already regretting making that request. Suddenly, my phone began to vibrate. I hurriedly rushed for the phone, expecting to see a name and a number across my screen. I was disappointed when I saw a reminder instead. I silenced it, dropped it back on the table and sank back in my chair. “Bassey, oga dey call you,” I heard the secretary’s voice just at the door. I felt like a garri sack as I tried to move from my chair. After few seconds, I was at the door.

I opened the door without knocking and just as I stepped in, my eyes met a stern look on my boss’ face, capable of taking all nine lives out of a cat. I tried to mutter my favourite words but he cut me short and waved his hands towards a seat beside his desk. He asked how I was faring, if I had any challenges…bla bla bla. Soon, our conversation drifted to the NASS crisis and then to relationships. Then he said to me, without any preamble, “Never marry your age mate.” I asked him why and he told me everybody’s favourite sentence, “You won’t understand.” If I got N1,000 for every time I heard that sentence, I’d probably be competing with Zuckerberg . The next time I hear those words from anybody…let me comment my reserve.

Back to my gist; age … I don’t know why people place so much emphasis on that number, especially when it comes to the age gap that should exist between a husband and his wife. I don’t belong to this class of believers. I know women naturally age faster than men but it’s quite relative too. It’s not in all cases, as I’ve seen instances where older women look younger than their juniors. I know a couple that are of the same age but then, the wife still looks younger than he does. I also know a couple; the wife looks older but she’s younger in age. Marrying a girl ten years your junior is no guarantee that she’ll look younger than you ten years from now. Recently, I watched a woman celebrate her birthday on a TV programme. She was about 55 I think but she looked a lot younger than her daughter.

It’s common amongst African women to just go to sleep after they get married. They suddenly begin to care less about how the look and rather, begin to worry, scream their lungs out and express all their frustration on their kids but they fail to notice that it takes a toll on them. Yes, ladies chill, before you begin to make suya out of me, the men are guilty too. Suddenly they become too busy, stop sending those lovely text messages, they stop to play with their wives and when the lady begins to lose shape, they start look outside. If you enter most homes, you’ll leave with the impression that they couples are civil war veterans suffering from post-traumatic stress.

Age is a number and how you care of yourself is all that matters. If all you do is frown from morning till night, then trust me, you’ll most definitely age faster. Start talking rather than screaming, start to smile rather than frown, think less and worry about nothing( that’s hard), exercise regularly, hang out with friends…these are just a few simple things that will keep you and fresh for a long.

I’ll also like to chirp this one in; a lot of people just believe there is a certain age for one to become successful. This irks me a lot because I don’t understand why most people have that ideology.  Some people just believe in following norms, following protocols and using the same methods over and again. “This is how my father did his, I did it the same way, so you must do same”…like we’re still in 1960 or something. Times have changed and the age thing is gradually becoming a number and not a criterion for when you can start achieving your life goals and dreams. To be precise, why wait for a year, when you get older with every passing second? My boss always tells me, “A second from now, you’ll be older than you were a second ago.” For me maturity is all that counts and the fact that you’ve chosen not to mature at 30 or more, does not mean the same is the case with every other person. The fact that you and your friends aspire to marry or get successful within a particular age range doesn’t make that age range the minimum for any other person who hopes to marry or achieve a particular goal. Don’t make the wrong choice because of age criterion.

Shortest article I’ve ever written.

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